Why haven’t I blogged? Honestly it is because I have been doing other things. Whether that is going on adventures, editing videos, or writing outlines for my TV show/book ideas.
I just haven’t found the inspiration because I was so inspired by other things. I am a terrible multi-tasker. I will however have five projects or more unfinished at a time. But you better believe that if I am working on that one thing it is the only thing I am working on. At least for that period of time.
I rarely ever follow through with my ideas or little projects which is honestly not good. I lose inspiration for things so quickly. The passion is just gone and I have moved onto something else. My eyes have been diverted. Sometimes I go back to the thing I left behind but mostly it just gets lost in the pile.
Speaking of piles. I am such a disorganized mess. Everything is everywhere but everything is in its place. If you move something of mine I won’t be able to find it because I didn’t put it there in the first place. I am really particular about how things a placed. Especially when I am working. You might think that I just have my things randomly placed around me. But they are all perfectly proportioned and photographed there in my mind. If you move it it disrupts the whole balance and harmony of my environment.
I am the same way with writing. My paragraphs either all have to be the same length or I have to have a succession of length in each paragraph. It all flows. Is all balanced. It makes sense. I need for things to make sense. I am the person always needing to know why I do a math problem the way I do it for me to understand it. For example my mother was trying to explain stocks to me but it wasn’t clicking because our brains and how they process things are different. Everyone probably thinks I am weird but I love to know what personality type people are and always ask them to take the quiz.
Going off on me being weird. I don’t set my alarms at the usual 7:15 am or 7:30. Oh goodness no. I set my alarms at 7:16 am and 7:29 am. Or 11:38 and 11:54. My brain doesn’t get the rigid times- I don’t want to wake up at 7:15 because it doesn’t feel right. My alarm times change all of the time. Depending on when I go to bed and how much time I think I will need to get up. I don’t know how this relates to me not writing a blog post. But I guess it gives you an insight into my scattered brain. Let’s talk about going to bed. I can’t set a bed time. Every time I try to tell myself to go to bed at 12:30 am it is always an hour before I actually start getting ready. Hence me not actually going to bed till 1:50 am last night.
I also find it hilarious when people think I am an extravert. I love interacting with people so I can word vomit and share the million things going on in my head but other than that I hate human interaction- especially on a stranger-acquintance level. For example today I had lunch with a friend and an hour and half passed but I didn’t want her to leave. I wanted to stay there talking and catching up forever. That slot of time wasn’t enough. There was so much more to say and get out. If it wasn’t for her having to leave I could’ve easily been late to class. But one thing people never get is after spending time with people I ALWAYS need to recharge. I could be hanging out in my dorm with my friends all day sometimes talking sometimes not but I always spend three to four hours detoxing from the day.
Well I think this is a long enough blog post for getting back in the swing of things. I am so glad I had this opportunity to get my thoughts written down in this mess of a blog I call mine. It has been real and fun sharing my random thoughts that my friends don’t have to suffer through now. I love to think and share what I am feeling whatever that may be. This is a place where I can process and write down what is going on and how I am living in or observing the world. I am trying so hard to make this paragraph longer than the one before it. But I am literally just rambling and wasting your precious time. I hope you disregard this piece of trash and check out my other blog entries that have more of a flow and purpose if that is even possible. And that is why I haven’t written a blog post in almost a month. Here is to hoping that doesn’t happen again but in all honesty it might. Guess you will just have to follow me to see.